The beginning

I would say that really the beginning was back in October, when we had a big scare after an ultrasound.  We thought that Dane had no corpus callosum, the membrane that links the left and right hemispheres of the brain together and transmits information between the two sides. 

This possibility arose when we had an ultrasound at the OB's office when I was being paranoid about not feeling Dane move as much as I thought he should at 28 weeks.  They did the ultrasound to check him out and make sure he was moving, which he was, but they also found that he had a cyst on his brain.  We were sent to Comprehensive Fetal Care to get a more intensive ultrasound to get a better idea as to what kind of cyst he had, and once there, the doctor also noted that he did not see Dane's corpus callosum.  We had to wait a week for another ultrasound, during which I kept expecting the doctor to say, "Oh! There it is!", but he did not, and sent me to get a fetal MRI a week and a half later.  During this entire time, we were scared, worried, and questioning everything we did during the pregancy, trying to figure out what would cause something like this to happen. 

After the MRI, (one hour in a tube, which for a claustrophobic person such as myself was equal to the seventh level of hell), the doctor saw us a week later to go over the results.  I reached a breaking point in the waiting room immediately before the doctor saw us, because I just did not want to hear that not only did they not find a corpus callosum but that they found something else that would be devastating in an entirely new way.  I started crying in the waiting room, and all the way back into the doctor's office.  He walks in and says, "Oh, did someone already tell you the results of the MRI?"  My husband and I just looked at each other with chalk white faces and said, "No, and that is not a good sign!"  The doctor said, "They found his corpus callosum, it is 100% there.  So is his cyst, but that will probably go away and we aren't going to need to do anything about it."  I started laughing hysterically because it was all just too much to go from low to high in the space of 30 seconds, and Andrew just looked confused and said, "wait, what just happened?  What is going on?"  Again we were assured that our son's brain was fine, and that we had nothing to worry about in the short run, but that once he was born he would need an MRI to see what was going on with his cyst.

 Andrew and I walked around in a daze for a couple of days letting the idea that our son was going to be okay sink in.  It took a while to get over the drain from all of the stress of the previous three weeks, and the intense tiredness from carrying around so much stress for so long.  Just as things were getting back to normal, and we were starting to enjoy the pregnancy again, the contractions began.

At this point we were at 32 weeks and 6 days.  I went to the ER by myself hoping that I was being paranoid and that it was just Braxton Hicks.  They gave me a terbutaline shot, observed me until 1 AM Tuesday morning, and sent me home.  I stayed on bedrest (sort of) all day Tuesday, and Tuesday night at 11 PM, they came back, stronger than before, and much more often.  This time, Andrew came with me, and once we got to the ER again, I got three shots of terbutaline, and was then sent in an ambulance to Forsyth Medical Center because I was having labor pattern contractions.  We got to Forsyth around 3 AM Wednesday morning, and I was observed all day and sent home around 6 PM that night.  The contractions began again Thursday morning, got stronger and stronger, until at 4 AM Friday morning I couldn't take it anymore and we went back to Forsyth's ER.  I was admitted to Labor and Delivery, had strong contractions, put on magnesium sulfate for a day and a half, and when none of that worked and I was dilated to four centimeters, was told it was time to have a c section and gave birth to Dane at 10:42 AM on November 19th, 2011.  He was 33 weeks and 5 days old, weighed 4 lbs 13 oz, and was 18 1/2 inches long.  He cried twice and then went into respiratory distress.  They rushed him down to the NICU where he was resuscitated and immediately put on a ventilator. 

It turned out that he had choanal atresia, which means that his nasal passage was blocked with a bone, and since babies are obligate nose breathers, he couldn't breathe.  Andrew had watched him struggle to breathe, and saw the swarm of doctors rush to help his son, and has been deeply affected by that ever since.  Thus began our stay at the NICU at Forsyth Medical Center, the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, and the beginning of a journey that has changed the way our family interacts, the way we view life, and the realization that without God, our friends, and our amazing families, we would not be able to endure. 

It is really interesting what you can go through, what you can stand, when you have support, and when you have a child that is relying on you and your strength.  We are going to document our journey on this blog, in part to keep our friends and family informed as to the latest news with Dane, as well as to hopefully provide inspiration to other families that may be experiencing the same thing.  Thank you for coming along on this journey with us.